The Prodigal Daughter
A Spiritual Journey: From Darkness to Light
By: Sheri Hein
I knew at a young age that there was more to my existence than just the physical realm. I grew up in a Christian home with morals and biblical principles, being taught right from wrong. I had a clear understanding about the role that Jesus Christ played in my family’s life, as well as in my own life. As a result, I accepted Jesus as the Lord of my life at the age of 9.
Moving into adolescence I recognized that I was becoming increasingly more rebellious and beginning to place myself in situations that allowed me to become farther away from the values that I so dearly held at the true core of myself. I grew further away from what I had been taught and who I truly was as a person. Just as the younger son in the parable of “The Prodigal Son,” I became lost. I believe this is an example of how God will let the sinner go his own way, and make his/her own choices (Deuteronomy 30:19.) I was filled with selfish ambition with a need to be independent. My foolish ambition allowed me to persist in my sinful ways. This sinful state caused a departure and distance from God that put me in a constant state of discontent and confusion (Romans 1:21). Consequently, I lived most of my young adult life in a state of continual dissatisfaction and disappointment. Instead of turning back to God to fill this void, I chose to fill it with the things of this world. For example, drugs, unhealthy relationships, and ultimately moving away from my family.
While attending my final year of high school, I began attending the University of Northern Colorado. I completed high school and continued my studies at the University of Northern Colorado; however, I soon lost interest in my studies and began pursuing extracurricular activities, such as parties, bar-hopping, and neglecting my studies. After completing a year at UNC, I moved to Garden City, Kansas to live with my sister in an attempt to re-focus my life. I began attending a local community college and earned the prestigious honor of “Student of the Year.” During this time, I also met a man named David Guebara, who would soon become my first husband.
After spending a year in Kansas I returned to Colorado. When returning to Colorado I discovered that my father lost his job after twenty years. This was a devastating blow to our family. As a result, he and my mother chose to move to South Africa for a new job opportunity. I had to make a choice; I either had to go to South Africa with my parents, or stay in the country and figure out what I was going to do next. Because David, my first husband, was in the Army and stationed in Texas I chose to stay and go to school in Texas. I moved to Huntsville, Texas and started school at Sam Houston State University. I did not adjust well to the move and found myself having many emotional problems, such as feeling lonely and abandoned. My best coping skills at that time were drinking and smoking marijuana and so that’s what I did.
David and I eventually got married and we moved to Killeen Texas, not far from Fort Hood. While in Texas I got pregnant and we had my son Richard. Life was good for us. I was sober, working, and David was happily serving our country in the United States Army. While in the Army, David sustained an injury and he was forced out of the military. Once again, this was a devastating blow. We didn’t know what we were going to do, so we decided to move back to Colorado. We decided to finish our educations and started back to school. David struggled with the transition and couldn’t seem to get his life together. We had many problems in our marriage and due to the strain, David moved back to Garden City, Kansas.
David and I were separated for several years before the divorce was final. During that time, I completed my degree, started working for Platte Valley Detention Center, and moved into a house with my son. I enjoyed my job but struggled with juggling the responsibilities of being a single parent and working long hours, as well as the differential shifts. One day, while visiting a friend, I was introduced to Methamphetamines. She told me that this drug would give me incredible energy. I tried it the first time and I felt like superman. It gave me enough energy to work, to take care of my son, take care of my house, and accomplish all I needed to. I thought it was innocent enough at first. Little did I know how devastating it would be to my life. Before I knew it, I was using it on a daily basis and absolutely consumed with it. Before long, I could no longer function at work, take care of my son, or maintain my home. I quit my job and moved back in with my parents, so they could help me take care of my son and help me financially. By the choices I made, I was moving further and further into the darkness of the drug culture. The person I once knew, the values I thought I would never compromise, were becoming blurred and I was slowly dying. I was doing this to myself, but I didn’t care because I had become a slave to Methamphetamines.
During this time, Monte Hein, who had been a longtime friend of the family, had taken a more active role in my son’s life through Moto-Cross. Monte was supportive of Richard and saw that he was in need of a stronger male presence. Because of that, Monte and I also started to spend more time together. After a couple of years, Monte and I moved in together and our daughter, Maddie, was born. We were married on August 28, 2010.
Despite having the support of family and friends, I continued to spin out of control. I had also become a threat to those around me, including the greater community as my past choices were finally catching up to me. As a result, in December of 2005, I was arrested for attempted distribution. While awaiting sentencing, I decided to participate in treatment, not with the intention of getting better, but with the intention that it would look good when I went back to court for sentencing. I attended and completed a 30 day inpatient treatment program called Summer Sky in Stephenville, Texas. Two weeks out of treatment I relapsed and went back to using drugs. I was sentenced to four years’ probation; however, continued to use methamphetamines. My probation officer told me I needed to admit myself into treatment again. I entered into an outpatient program, in Fort Collins, called “The Inner Balance Health Center”. The Inner Balance Health Center is a holistic treatment center for substance abuse. In treatment I worked on healing the damage I had done to my body physically, but I remained resistant to addressing my actual drug problem. After a year of continual noncompliance and drug use my probation was revoked. After appearing in court, my probation was reinstated and I was put in the Female Offender Program. The Female Offender Program offered me a higher level of supervision, and increased my treatment. For a time I was able to maintain periods of sobriety. However, it wasn’t long and I was back to my old ways. Even with all the treatment I had received, I just couldn’t seem to put it together. Eventually, I failed out of the Female Offender Program and was facing another probation revocation.
I had a month to wait for my next court date to see what my fate would be. The best outcome could be a yearlong sentence at the local half-way house. The worst possible outcome could be 6 to 12 years in prison. While awaiting sentencing, I was still under the supervision of the probation department. At my weekly supervision meetings my probation officer kept encouraging me to go to recovery support groups at Loved Ones Against Meth (LAM) ministry, and do counseling with Richard McMahan. Richard McMahan is a substance abuse counselor who uses equine therapy as part of his counseling practice. I remember very vividly, my first meeting with Richard. I arrived at his office and the first words out of his mouth were, “You know you can’t do this without Jesus”. Those words resonated deep within my soul. I hadn’t heard of, or thought about, Jesus for years, but I knew he was right. I listened as he spoke about the redemptive powers of Jesus. He explained that through Jesus I could be free from the bondage of addiction. I listened closely because by this time I had been part of numerous treatment programs and was still unable to stay sober. Up to this point, I had tried everything, but I hadn’t tried Jesus. I believe that Jesus had me in a situation where I had no one else to turn to, but Him. I finally had come to the end of myself.
Richard McMahan suggested that my husband and I check out this church called Waypoints Faith Community. He suggested it because he knew that there were people there who were just like me, addicted and in trouble with the law. My husband, along with our kids, went to church that very evening. This is where my journey really began. I finally realized, after being in denial for so long, the destitute condition of my life. I realized that apart from God there was no hope. I “came to my senses” as the Bible states and wanted to come home to my heavenly father. For the next month, I began attending church and faith based recovery support groups. At this point, I let go of my need for independence and control and completely surrendered to the Lord. I did this knowing that once I let go and let God, there would be no turning back. I had turned the situation over to Him and trusted that wherever I ended up would be exactly where He needed me to be. I was prepared for whatever was coming. I humbled myself and repented from my old ways. I decided to trust Him completely and gave my life to Him.
The court date finally arrived. My attorney and I showed up for court ready to take a plea deal, if one was offered. Much to my surprise the district attorney offered me a program called Adult Drug Court. The Adult Drug Court is an alternative sentencing program as a last chance before prison. Being part of the program would allow me to have my freedom and remain in the community. My attorney and I discussed it and I decided at that time that anything was better than prison, so I accepted. Little did I know how my life would be forever changed as a result? My case had to be reviewed by the Drug Court Team, so the judge told me to come back in another month.
Meanwhile, waiting for the decision, I continued to be fully focused on Jesus and my recovery. I had already been attending our new church for several weeks now. One day, the pastor started a new sermon series called the “Exodus Story”. For the next month I sat in church each week listening to the story of how God freed the Israelites from their bondage of slavery and led them to a new life. Their story was my story. Everything I was hearing was parallel with my unique life story. I realized we serve a very loving and gracious God. I kept thinking if he can free the Israelites form their bondage He can do the same for me, and He did. By the grace of God, one month later I was accepted into the Adult Drug Court Program. I believed this was truly a turning point for me.
For the next 18 months, I attended intensive outpatient treatment several times a week, involved myself in LAM ministry’s one year recovery program, went to church at Waypoints, and attended several weekly Bible studies. As a result, I found strength and a new way of thinking. I began to have hope and saw a light in my life. I saw a new way of living. I began to see amazing changes taking place as I trusted the guidance of the Holy Spirit and acted accordingly. I think my story demonstrates God’s impeccable timing and planning. It is my belief that God utilized the legal system as part of that plan. He used certain people within that system to shine a light into my darkness…my secret…my shame. It was at that point that I was able to see again and was able to hear again.
I finally graduated from the program in 2010 as a completely new and changed person. God showed me amazing mercy and grace and I am so grateful for how He worked things out in my life. Now, with a new identity in Christ, I have worked on repairing the damage I did to myself and to all those around me. I truly believe he was equipping me for my calling. I have found the freedom to become what God wants me to become, to be useful to His people and to fulfill God’s purpose for my life. I absolutely believe that He brought me through the desert, so that I can now be a beacon of light to others in the same situation.
Like the prodigal son’s father, I believe that Jesus waited a long time for my return. He patiently waited for me to repent and as a result offered unconditional love and acceptance when I did. Giving God all the glory, my life has been completely restored, not to what was, but to more than I could have hoped for (Ephesians 3:20). Instead of condemnation, there is rejoicing for a son who had been dead but now is alive, who once was lost but now is found (Romans 8:1, John 5:24).
I have been a believer all my life and rededicated my life to Christ five years ago. On August 28th, 2013, I will have maintained five years of sobriety. I was baptized, by water submersion, in October 2009. I have been involved with numerous ministries for the past four years, as well. My family attends church two times a week and participates in small group studies. Every other week, I lead the children’s ministry. Likewise, my husband serves as an elder for our church for the past two years and continues to do so. Also, my daughter will be attending Dayspring Christian Academy this fall. As a whole, my family’s daily lives revolve around our beliefs and our church community.
Experience in Christian Ministry:
Loved Ones Against Meth (LAM) Ministry: I was part of this ministry for two years acting as Service coordinator for their sober living house, facilitating faith based recovery support groups, and facilitating women’s Bible studies. In addition, I was part of their missions program and went on a trip to the Phoenix Dream Center and served the people there.
Tower 21/Waypoints Faith Community: Tower 21 opened three years ago; there I provide faith based support services for addicts involved in the legal system. For the past several years, I have been facilitating numerous recovery support groups. For example, I co-facilitate a group called Celebrate Life in Recovery. This is a weekly group that I have been a part of for the past four, almost five, years, first as a participant and now as facilitator. In addition, I co-facilitated the weekly Bondage Breaker book study/ recovery group.
The Natural Humanship Training Program: This program is a Christian equine therapy program ran by Richard McMahan. I first attended his groups in 2006 as a participant and now am a volunteer.
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